NIGHTJAR’S ELEGY IN A BALI COUNTRY GARDEN &
Bali HHH II Hash Trash SUN 26 DEC 2021
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It all began with STEPTOE & CHOCOLATE FINGER’S gaf up the road, where a preponderance of HASHERS assembled for Christmas piss-up and exercised their limbs on the corkscrew staircase. Great view. Then to WORLD OF APUH, far from the madding crowd, for a few days to celebrate HARI NATAL en famille. Really heavenly and new baby in splendid form. Garden teeming with butterflies with eponymous Helena Birdwing predominating, loads of swallowtails – Banded and Swift Peacock, Great and Common Mormon – latter in copula with a fine pink morph – both female forms of Diadem bolina – Iphigenia and Proserpina – and masses of palm-flies, pansies and tigers in the borders. Couldn’t beat them off with a stick. And once more that rare variety of buttonquail (Small sylvatica) that pottered by the verandah while I was breakfasting on kampung chicken eggs. There were two of them, birds and eggs/quails in aspic.
And then (yesterday) the run on HARRY BOXERS. What an extravaganza. Perfect conditions – well done WOODEN EYE – on soft turf lawn of the HATTEN & TWO ISLANDS winery in Sanur, hard by the bypass road which was not traversed on this occasion. Huge turnout – well over one hundred, comprising many returners, most not seen for months on end including CANE RAT, DANCING QUEEN, OLD GOAT, DEAD MEAT, MUDDY MAN & GRITTY BALLS newly returned from blighty and ten days incarceration in Jakarta hotel. Welcome back. HARES SERIAL OFFENDER, HARELIP, AMAZON ARSE, MUDDY MAN and prepossessing paper bitch MUDDY GIRL did us proud, half the run not unexpectedly on the beach with no dearth of piss-stops for refreshment. So why were certain individuals penalized for patronizing them? But not undeservedly all Pommies hauled in for their shameful performance at the HASHES down-under. Disproportionately huge cake for WHILE YOU’RE DOWN THERE – Happy Birthday you Bastard: fantastic shirt of SANTA shitting on chimney pot designed by WOODEN EYE: delicious satays courtesy DEADWOOD: and degustation of Hatten’s latest productions. Wank you very crutch. Of course, it was Thomas Gray’s birthday (1716): his Elegy is the one poem every prep-school boy should be familiar with. He also wrote: When Ignorance is Bliss, ‘Tis Folly to be wise. ON ON & ON…..